Round One and already Out

01 Sep

I don’t know what kind of reference that title is. Is it baseball? Basketball? Boxing? Some show I haven’t watched and will probably never watch? I think I know it from Gilmore Girls (Lorelai) and now that I think about it, its very unlikely Lorelai Gilmore ever used sports language in her Mamet-esque daily parlance. Look at me. I may disappoint in not posting something but by god, I make up by using words like parlance.

So yes, I did not post. It slipped my mind what with the going on a Seinfeld bender, trying to find articles to use for Paper entitled “The Economics of BioDiversity Conservation”, getting a cold which makes me wanna sing badly in what I consider my sexy voice and getting FUCKING SHITFACED.

There’s the embarrassing fact – and I know everyone, absolutely everyone knows this – I got all fucked up shitfaced with insane amounts of alcohol last night. It was quite nice for me. I doubt it was any fun for H, whom in my defense, told me early on in the night that I was allowed to completely lose it since she didn’t plan on drinking much. What are ladies nights for?

Anyway, there are several things which are embarrassing about this incident. Firstly, it wounds my pride. I happen to be very good with alcohol. The fact that I got that shitfaced and that I had to vomit at all today, let alone the first half of today, makes me question my existence. Secondly, when I’m drunk, lets just say the darkest part of my personality comes out. The evil side. I don’t know if I said anything of the sort last night, but who knows. I do remember telling someone (don’t remember who) that “fuck relationships man. They suuuuck.” Now I had no locus to say that seeing as I’m single and have never been otherwise. Apparently, that was the worst I did. Again, as far as people will tell me.

But here’s the beautiful fact. I changed in the bathroom at the club. Out of my jeans and into the skirt. And not in a cubicle. In front of a girl whom I remember as laughing uncomfortably at my antics (antics being the mild word for DRUNKEN FUCKING BULLSHIT). I do remember thinking, if not saying, “Wow, you’re not bad looking at all” or something along those lines. Now I cannot be relied on here since as we know, alcohol makes a lot of people look good. But I am now a certified butch. Nah. I thought some girl was hot while I was forcibly subjecting her to watching me change (something my best friends don’t wanna see me do). Doesn’t mean I’m a lesbian. It means that for some reason I thought this chick was not bad looking and that changing into my skirt was just the thing to do. I cannot imagine why I thought the changing would do any good to my life. But I did it. I know people who have in the past, under the effects of alcohol thought of divesting of their clothing as a good idea. Thankfully, I didn’t divest. I merely changed. So there.

That’s the embarrassing detail. And it blends in perfectly for my reason for not posting something. What a fucking pain.

Bye bye.

Here’s something to distract from the lowsiness I felt all day –



The Spanish Inquisition is actually the topic for my History of Punishment paper. Guess how I got interested in the subject.



Also found this on tumblr –

I find it amusing. You go fuck yourself if you don’t.

That’s all.

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Posted by on September 1, 2012 in Bakchodi, Fluff, Random


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