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The DIRTIEST Picture

27 Dec

I cannot stop smiling. I know the hour is late and I should be in bed if I’m supposed to perform tomorrow the way that the business demands. The things I have to do are very taxing, and I don’t mean that in a self-congratulatory way. Technically speaking, anyone can do it, but for those who know me well, they know I really am not being an egotist when I say that it just takes a special drive to give the kind of performance this job demands. I mean its taxing. Anyone who’s done it before knows it. It is never easy. And you can lose the people’s confidence in just a single second and next thing you know you’re rolling around in your own, and possibly your colleague’s shit, in a manner of speaking.

But I just saw this documentary, and right now, in that state you are in after you see or experience something that touches you, I cannot stop smiling – I loved it. I may be able to come up with a more nuanced, far more constructive review of the movie and the subject, but for now, I feel the need to let out this raw, fundamental reaction. It had most of all of my favorite comedians, some I had only heard of, and some I had seen but whose names I hadn’t known, and they were all just delightful.

I don’t remember when I first heard the joke. Or when first I read it. Or when I first saw it being told. I do remember I thought it was a hoot. I didn’t shit my pants laughing, but I was told the tame version. And the movie. Well, The Aristocrats is the dirtiest thing you can ever see if you have an imagination. It doesn’t have any violence, and there are no nude people. But boy, if you thought you had a stomach for the rough stuff, this is it. The dirtiest, sickest joke ever created, told by arguably the funniest people in show business. And it’s not the versions you heard on TV or the ones that your friends ever told you, because unless you have that weird understanding these men and women had between them, none of your friends would ever think about making up a version that will not be allowed on TV.

I can personally think of two, maybe three people I can make one up for and tell it to. I wouldn’t dare with anyone else. And I am a little ashamed of that. I long for the day when I can let one rip right here on the WWW, where eventually, boredom will bring all of my acquaintances and friends over, over a long, long period of time, and then I wouldn’t give an incestuous family about what people thought of it.

I have mentioned recently, I have rediscovered my love of comedy, and if there was anything left that could drive me further into that beautiful, beautiful pit, it would have been this. I will not deign to tell the joke as told by someone else. I swear I will only tell it if I ever have the guts to make one up. And I won’t give the outline because if you haven’t already heard a version of it, you need to Youtube it. Do not Google it and read about it, because that would just be adding to the sins here. And you need to find a video that has something along the lines of “Broke my penis laughing at this” as description, within the search results you get. I recommend Bob Saget though I’m not such a huge fan of the guy. Also, he was one of the worst/best in the movie, so it may not be good for some folks. The Sarah Silverman one is also very good.

It is recommended. So recommended. So highly.

That’s all. I’m going to try and go to sleep.

–          Billy

P.S. – for those who may know of this – yes, I found out about the movie in the most obvious manner if one considers my recent posts. Guilty as charged.

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Posted by on December 27, 2011 in Bakchodi, Fun!, Random

 

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